Episode 83 – Resonate

This is Rebecca Clark. Episode 83 Resonate. This podcast is for anyone that knows they haven’t yet found and offered up their best work but are compelled to seek it out and do it. Are you ready to move your desk? Hello, friends. Great to be with you today. You may have noticed that periodically on the podcast, I provide the definition to a basic word. I do that because sometimes, as I’m preparing episodes, I realized that maybe I should look up with something actually means because I’m so used to saying it that I may have for gotten the original meaning. And I did that today with Resonate and I surprised because it says it’s a verb and that to resonate is to produce or be filled with a deep, full reverberating sound or to evoke or suggest images, memories and emotions, or to meet with someone’s agreement. But there’s also the use in a technical way to produce electrical or mechanical resonance like the crystal resonates at 16 megahertz. I guess I was fascinated because at first I didn’t see all the parts of the definition, and it totally focused on sound the reverberating sound for some reason that brought back to me memories of music Music has been part of my life ever since I can remember both. My grandmothers were pianists and organists, but I don’t know if they played any other instruments. Both my grandfathers learned how to play the piano and little parts of the organiz well, but it was my grandmother’s that made music a huge part of their lives and therefore part of the lives of their Children. My mother plays the piano, and she also took organ lessons as well. When I was a teenager, all of my siblings know how to do something with music, right? You either play the piano and or organ an orchestra, instruments or singing or some kind of combination. We have a love for music, and we grew up going to concerts. We grew up some of us playing and concerts and in piano recitals, and we continued this tradition through our lives to this point. And so this resonate word resonated with me when it came to music and also in general as a topic that I wanted to explore. So I wanted to share a few stories to talk about this topic today in the fifth grade. In our school, you could start playing a string instrument, and I hesitated. Didn’t have the guts to do it. But I wanted to play the violin, and sixth grade came around. And my sister Raelynn was in the fifth grade when I was in the sixth grade, and we both went together to explore playing a string instrument, and she chose the violin and she really loved it. And I was a little wishy washy at that point because part of me was like, Well, I kind of like the cello. But of course, these were the two most popular instruments that the school provided, and by the time I made my decision, I would either have to purchase a cello or violin or play the viola and I decided to play the viola, so I started a year later than most people did. But I did play all the way through junior high and high school. My sister Raelynn play the violin through Junior I High School and ended up being in the Phoenix Metro Orchestra or some kind of major orchestra in the Phoenix area. And so she was very committed to her instrument, and what was funny is that are two other sisters. Renee and Rhianna chose cello and bass and moved forward with those instruments. So it’s really fun to sometimes play together and be accompanied by her mom on the piano. So I really enjoyed the viola. I liked that it wasn’t so high and screechy as a violin could be, but it was also easy to transport, and it was different and unique, and I kind of liked that. And I was one of those people that was sometimes the first chair, sometimes a second, sometimes the fourth or fifth, depending on if I practiced, depending on how well I did on the playing test. And I never really persevered as a viola player actually spent more time practicing the piano. And it’s interesting because the violin and the base you can essentially open up any piano book and play from, But the viola is different. It’s the alto cliff, so it was easy in orchestra class to read music because the music was written for the alto clef for the viola part. But if I was at home practicing with my siblings or with others, I would have to transpose in my head from the alto clef to the trouble Cliff. So it’s very interesting, but you get used to it because that’s what you dio when you play the viola so fast. Forward to college. I was someone that kept changing my major, but along with that, I would take these courses for fun. So I took a lot of sports classes and other areas of interest and part way through college. I decided to take a cello class and an organ class, and the cello class was one on one In the organ class was group, and so there’s pros and cons to both of those. But the outcome was I actually learned how to play the organ far better than playing the cello. But that didn’t stop my desire for cello because secretly, in the back of my mind, I always wish that I’d played the cello. So a few times in the last few months, I’ve realized that I could actually start playing the cello again without learning anything new, which sounds crazy, right? But I realized that even though I wasn’t good at reading cello music, I can still read Viola music, and that’s important because the viola and the cello have the same strings. It’s just that the cello strings are one octave lower, so I could technically play the cello. But read viola music. If that makes sense and I could start playing the cello. I guess this is that the forefront, because I bought a cheap viola from eBay a couple years ago and was surprised at how screechy I sounded, but was also reminded of one of the challenges I had with the viola and that was balancing it under my neck while I played. And if you don’t do that right, you also don’t master vibrato with the bow, right? And so you you don’t make this amazing sound. It’s just kind of raw noise that may or may not be in tune, but with the cello. You’re sitting there and you don’t need to hold it under your chin. And I have better control of the bow on the cello. So isn’t that interesting? I had this new thought that resonated with me that Oh, I have all the tools at my disposal right now to play the cello. So somewhere along the way, soon I could purchase a cello or rent a cello and play it from viola music. And on the way, when I’m ready, I can learn how to play the cello notes again from cello music and, hopefully, progress to the point that I’m interested in progressing, too. Now this approach may not resonate with you, and that’s okay. It’s not supposed thio. Unless, of course, it does resonate right. It’s supposed to resonate with me so that I have the courage and the guts and a little bit of hope that I could actually get back to pursuing some of my musical interests again. Because when any of us desires to take up the next step in our work, it can bring up all kinds of fears and anticipation, insecurities and doubts. Right? And so in this process, some of my frequent thoughts and questions include. Should I really do that? Is it worth it? What if I’m not that good at it? What if what I am compelled to create or teach isn’t something others care about? What if others think I’m redundant? Just another pianist, cellist, project manager, coach, teacher, car salesman, mechanic, bank teller, multi level marketing, person, Or why should I pursue this if I already have something that pays the bills and I’m comfortable and before you’ve even opened your mouth to anyone about your desire, you’ve mentally talked yourself out of pursuing something outside of your comfort zone, even though it is a deep rooted desire. About two years ago, I was doubting my decision to leave my job. I hadn’t left yet, but I was mentally preparing for the next steps. And so, in the midst of it, I started to doubt what I could offer others, right, And I just mentioned a few of these things. Yes, I had project management, background and instructional design and instructional technologies and training and recruiting skills and learning, management skills and process skills. But all of that stuff seemed very normal in my head, like I’d just be another noisy person in the atmosphere touting that right. But then someone I knew left our organization because she felt compelled to use her talents in a different way. And this is Kim Richards. She was a very talented program and project manager. She had instructional design experience. She had operations experience and graphic design, but in addition to that, she designed clothing she painted. She was very artistic, and she wanted to move on and spend a little more time with art. So she traded her own little small woman owned business and contract ID to the government, using her project management, instructional design and other skills. And then, with her more flexible schedule, she pursued more of her art. I talked to her about why she left, and she said she read a book that changed her life. And of course, whenever we make a decision, there’s a Siris of nudges that we experience. And I’ve called these a sequence of nudges and other episodes. And this book was called Shift by Peter Arnell. How to reinvent Your Happiness, your career and your personal brand, right, So as I say that I’m assuming you have certain thoughts that come to mind like I did when I heard the title. I’m like, Oh, this book changed your life. It’s all about how do you reinvent yourself in your career and business? This is totally up my alley. So I bought it and read it, and it had all the things that air in the books that I love to read. Write about following your purpose. Designing your life in the way that fits how you work and what you love. Your purpose, your passion, all the things. But the book did not resonate with me, and I’m someone who finishes every book I read. In fact, one of my issues is I read books too fast. I need to slow down, absorb some teach from it some share some and then go back and read. But no, I just bionic through stuff, so I have no problem reading 50 60 books a year. But this was hard for me. I like this is not resonating with me. Why did this book change her life? But I was determined that I would finish the book because, of course, the precious nuggets that I needed to know would be a the end. Right? So I thought, I’ll keep reading. And then this light bulb went off and I think it was around that halfway point. I knew why it changed her life and because it changed her life and I took the chance to read it. It also changed mine at a critical point. The examples and stories that were shared in that book had to do with the fashion industry and the history of fashion and art and design. All of the stories in this book resonated with Kim, right, because she’s a designer. She loves all things design, and I love to claim that I love design. But when I’m around true designers, I realized that I have an immense appreciation for design, and I feel like I can choose great design over poor design. But I can’t actually make it happen if that makes sense. So, for example, if you’re looking at my Pinterest board of what I think is classy, fashionable clothing, you would be like, Oh, wow, she’s super classy. Maybe maybe you wouldn’t think that, but I can choose classy things, but for some reason I can’t implement them. So if you see me walking down the street or dressed up, I don’t quite emanate the classiness that I know how to select. If that makes sense and I’ll learn how to do that, I’m still willing to learn and want to step into that. But that’s an example of where I realize some people are far into design and understand far more than I Dio, and Kim is one of those people, and I could see all of a sudden why this book resonated with her. Everything about it spoke to her. And for some reason that helped me, because I realized that what I do and how I do it will not resonate with some people. But it will with others. Even though I do a lot of normal things, I will be doing them from Rebecca’s way. And Rebecca’s way may resonate with some people. Maybe my stories resonate with certain people and not with others, and that’s okay because I don’t need to resonate with the whole world. In fact, that’s very overwhelming, right? And so this is important when you take steps to change like it was one of the factors that made me realize it’s okay for me to take a step into entrepreneurship and coaching. I might do it differently than someone else, and that’s okay. My marketing will look different. It will resonate, perhaps with some and not with others, and I need to be okay with that. When I start comparing myself to others as well, and when something resonates, it’s like the reverberations that have talked about in the definition. There’s something that stirs us, and someone else could say almost the same thing with different stories, and it doesn’t click, but someone else will say it or contribute in a way. We’re like, Wow, I get it now I understand where I want to keep learning from that person. So I want to encourage you to just notice this in your life that there are people you’re attracted to, and they’re people that you aren’t, and that’s okay, and that can be in every aspect of life. But I like to focus on our work in this podcast because I think it’s a great way that we express ourselves and to recognize that every person that’s a coach or a project manager or a leader isn’t going to resonate with everyone they speak to. And they don’t have thio. But it’s important to not only find people that you resonate with toe learn from, but also to understand that when you offer up your best work that you can make sure your authentic to yourself and what you want to offer, knowing that you will resonate with some and you won’t resonate with others. That’s just part of stepping into your best work. I have gone through many experiences as an entrepreneur where something feels off, I suddenly feel like I’m hearing too much from a person or it’s just not driving well in my mind and I don’t know why, and I realized, Oh, that there’s something that feels wrong or not authentic to me in what I’m learning. And so I wanted to share this with you as I step out into the world as a coach and as a consultant and offer my products and services and time to you, knowing that some of what I do will not resonate with some of you. Or it’ll resonate enough where you’ll want to listen to my podcast. But you’ll never coach with me, and that’s okay. I just hope that you find someone that resonates with you that can help you through your growth process, if anything, for accountability, and to allow you the space to take a look at your own mind and your own hang up so that you can work on them with someone. But I want to offer today that I am starting a group coaching program November 30th of 2020 and each week there will be a new topic that comes to your inbox and there will be an opportunity to call in to get coached or to listen to someone else get coached. And I also have an option for 12 weeks if you want individual coaching one on one every week and that individual coaching will actually include the group programas Well so that that individually coached person gets the benefit of a group. So I wanted to offer that to you. If anything that I have shared in this podcast resonates with you and you are desiring to uplevel your work in any way and it doesn’t matter if you’re male or female or if you’re 17 or 75 I focus on people who want to step into the work they know they can offer up in this life. So if you’re in college and confused and you’re figuring out what work you want to dio, I can work with you. If you’re someone up leveling at work, I can work with you. If you’re someone transferring from a career to entrepreneurship, I can work with you because thes transitions require mindset shifts, and it will bring up all of your insecurities and all of your fears and all of the failure. And it’s a perfect time to have someone there guiding you to see your own mind and to see that you have within you since birth the ability to create and improve and grow and offer up your best work. So go to my website. Move your desk dot com, click on the work with me tab and you can see the programs and see if you’re interested in them. And if you’re not, maybe you know someone that is. And maybe if you don’t know anyone that is, you can still listen to the podcast if you want. Right, here’s the bottom line, though. I’m going to keep podcasting. I’m going to keep creating. I’m going to keep offering up my best work, and when I know more, I will do differently and improve and grow, and I expect nothing less from you. My friends have a great week. Stay safe, keep pressing forward and keep up the good work. Talk to you soon. Thanks for listening to the show today. If you enjoyed it I’d love if you’d write a review and share the show with your friends. Sign up for a weekly nudge at move your desk dot com. See you next Monday.