Episode 108 – Watch Your Mind

This is Rebecca Clark Episode 108. Watch your mind. This podcast is for anyone that knows they haven’t yet found and offered up their best work but are compelled to seek it out and do it. Are you ready to move your desk? Mhm, mm hmm. In the last few years I’ve been exposed to Children’s songs that I never heard when I was a child. And of course as time goes on some of the classics day, some of them fall away and new songs are created and that’s the case with lots of areas of life. Right?

One of the songs that I was not aware of was a song called Who’s a Good watcher. It’s a very simple song and a teacher usually stands or sits in front of a group of preschool age Children and has them clap their hands or clap on their legs or whatever and say, who’s a good watcher watcher watcher? Who’s a good watcher show me now and then she or he takes some kind of action like pat the head jump up and down or whatever and anyone who’s paying attention is supposed to copy that and then they do it again with some other action, who’s a good watcher watcher watcher who’s a good watcher, show me now and then of course the teacher can turn the reins over to one of the Children and they can lead it and so on and so forth.

Now the point of that song is to focus the Children, have them watch what someone is doing and follow it as a demonstration that they are listening and they’re hearing what’s going on and they understand what is expected. As I continue to go through life and work, I am continually reminded of how important it is to listen and to watch and to notice certain things and in the coaching world this comes up a lot and how important it is to watch, watch your mind, watch the actions, notice how your ideas and your thoughts are working for you and notice how they aren’t.

And to give yourself permission to change and to not just give permission but to realize that you can change right, That most of what’s going on in our heads is just a bunch of sentences, right? Just a bunch of thoughts, interpretations of certain events or circumstances or situations that are before us. And we often say in coaching that let’s let’s take a moment to watch your brain, watch your mind, see what’s going on in it. And we do that by allowing someone to talk. And then as a coach, you kind of pull out sentences from what are said or ask more questions about something the person has said and to really figure out what takes place once someone thinks or says something, Right?

Because everything that we think about turns into an emotion and leads us to take certain actions or two not have certain behaviors. And so often when I’m listening to people and having a conversation with them, I can get really caught up in what I’d like to say next. Or I can sit and listen and pay attention and ask questions and help them step into more awareness about what’s going on in their mind. And what’s fascinating to me is in the last few weeks as I have done this, I’ve identified ways that I might be just one step ahead.

Or I have identified things where I have gone through a whole cycle of experiments and challenges and failures and that I can now help someone move forward without going through some of those because some of those are unnecessary, right? If you know someone who knows better and you’re willing to listen to them, listen to them and skip some of the steps, some of the steps that took them thousands of hours to work through. And they are offering to you away not to have to go through all of that, right?

You’re still going to go through stuff, but you might not have to go through all of the stuff. If you’re willing to listen to someone who has gone before, I wanted to encourage you today To do two things. One is to watch your own mind, write it down if you have to and just go, why am I thinking that, what’s going on? That I am jumping to these conclusions or that I think this is the only option for me, kind of play the devil’s advocate on yourself as you watch it.

Like what if I could think the opposite of this, What if there’s other options that I’m not even thinking about and if you have to get someone else to bounce these thoughts off of just to be a check and balance. The second thing is to spend more time paying attention to what others are doing, what they’re saying, what they’re saying they’re thinking and watch it, notice it become aware and it can teach you a lot about yourself. It will certainly teach you about them, but it can also teach you about you.

I have become a firm believer in always getting help in those areas where I am helping others. So in coaching, I get coached because I have blind spots, I have things that I am not thinking through, that I think I’m thinking through and I’m really not and I need someone else to watch me and show me that. And as I do that it helps me better serve those that I coach as I’m consulting. I’m helping people with their website or email marketing or best practices or process re engineering.

And so I’m constantly having to look out to other resources to help me think better about those areas so that I can then help those I serve. And so it’s this constant process of noticing and learning and striving to see our own minds while also helping other people see there’s and how it’s working for them and how it’s not now. Of course the challenge in all of this can often be when you are offering your things that you’ve noticed and people have not asked for it. Like I do often I even say I can’t help myself, I’m going to share this with you.

It’s unsolicited opinion or unsolicited advice. But I also know that as I do that they can do what they want with it, right? Because they get to choose just like I chose to offer the unsolicited advice. Pay attention to yourself this week, be a good watcher and be a good watcher of others and see what you can learn from them. Help fill in their gaps for them if they desire it and be willing to have others help you fill in yours. It’s a very challenging process and very exhilarating at the same time when you realize all you have to do is ask someone to listen to you and ask you questions about why you think that way and wonder about other possibilities and through that process all of you will grow, all of us will grow and offer up our best work, have a great week.

And remember the little song Who’s a good watcher watcher watcher? Who’s a good watcher? Show me now, Talk to you soon. That’s thanks for listening to the show today. If you enjoyed it, I’d love if you’d write a review and share the show with your friends, sign up for a weekly nudge at move your desk dot com. Mhm.